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24.12.22 – End Of The Year

Dear diary,

Well here we are – the end of another year.

Is it me or are the years getting shorter?

The beginning of this year was a bit of a shit show for me. A lot was going on and I was really stressed. Middle of the year was better and now…I’m back in a low mood.

Although managing my feelings and pretending I’m OK is extremely easy, I’m finding not working is making me think more and with that, comes a whole dark cloud of negativity.

I hate being negative – nothing comes from it.

So as I see the new year in, here’s a list of what I’m leaving in 2022 –

1 – Not putting myself first! I never do it, not sure why but that’s changing from now.

2 – This fat stomach! It’s gotta go 😂

3 – Self doubt!

4 – Not setting boundaries!

5 – Being scared to go for what I want

Let’s see what 2023 has to bring shall we?

Merry Christmas to all celebrating and wishing you all a happy & positive New Year ❤️

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3.3.22 – 33 and…not keeping my promises!

Dear diary,

Your girl is a year older!

My birthday was last month and last year I set myself 3 goals to achieve by 33-

Lose 2 stone in weight. Volunteer/help those who need it and start a business.

Well…

I probably put 2 stone of weight on, I applied to volunteer but couldn’t do it in the end and I haven’t officially started a business but your girls been selling some Shea Butter so I definitely need to continue to push that!

I don’t know what happened. One minute I was turning 32 and then 33 just crept up on me.

I’m slightly disappointed I didn’t tick off the goals I had set for myself because what comes from not finishing something that you set out to do?

As I’m typing, I’m thinking, should I set some goals for this time next year? But there’s a voice saying “no point, you won’t do it!”

Well, naysayer voice in the background, I am!

By 34, I want to have at least set up a website for my shea butters (which are gorgeous if I do say so myself), be happier in my clothes (particularly my jeans) and I’d like to have published my book.

Boom!

Surely an easy enough set of targets!

Let’s see what’s gonna unfold!

Peace

✌🏾

xoxo

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2.2.22 – Taking the L

Dear diary,

Remember that job I said I got?

Well due to particular circumstances, I wasn’t able to take the job I had just been offered in December.

I’ve been feeling super down about it.

It was my dream job, in a dream location with a dream salary.

I had received so many rejections that I was absolutely buzzing that finally I go a yes!!!

But, sigh…sometimes in life we gotta take the L and admit defeat.

So, I’m back on the grind, applying to more jobs and continuing being rejected.

But if it happened once before, it’ll happen again…

I’d just like it to be now rather than later 🙃

BUT …did I learn a lesson from all this?

You bet your arse I did!

Keep your mouth shut until your first day 🤣

Ahhhh, it’s laugh or cry!

Wish me luck guys!

Peace ✌🏾

Xoxo

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1.1.22 – HAPPY NEW YEAR! 💫

Dear diary,

Happy New Year!

Who knows what will come of this year 🤷🏽‍♀️

Will we get our lives back like its 2018 again? Can I step into a nightclub again and bruk it down on the dance floor this year? Will I get engaged this year?

Who knows anything to do with the future?

But a few things I do know is –

1 – I’m grateful for everything I have

2 – I’m going to work extra hard to continue building the life I want for myself

3 – Imma keep on smiling! And maybe singing 😅

Every day is another chance to start again so I haven’t waited on the new year to make certain movements or changes but I have planned more moves to achieve during the first quarter of the year.

Have a great start to the new year guys!

Stay safe

Peace

xoxo

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4.12.21 – Taking your partner’s surname?!

Dear diary,

The topic of marriage pops up sometimes and it got me thinking…

Should he ask, I’m not sure if I want to take his surname 😬

My partner is adamant he wants me to take his surname. He spoke about us being a family and he doesn’t want our children having different surnames to their Mum. Plus, I’d be his wife. He wants to share his name with me.

I didn’t see what the big deal was.

I love my name! It’s mine! Not only am I the only child but I’m the only daughter – if I change my surname, it’ll be no more.

I’ve also heard men talk about marriage as of women are their possessions. If you look back on the history of marriage, women became mens property…..It’s a hell no from me!

But I know my partner wouldn’t see me like that. He doesn’t see me like that.

I took to social media to get other peoples views on it.

“It depends on what their name is. My last name is long so if their name was short I could double barrel. If their name is not popping im not taking that.” – Fair point!

“I won’t change mine. We will both have the same name” – That makes sense!

“I took his surname because it’s just culture. I thought about double barrel but thought that’s just long” – Culture popped up often!

“I would hypen it” – Hyphening names seems to be a popular option.

“….has said he’ll take mine 😂 my last name will die out as there’s 3 granddaughters so if we all got married it wouldn’t exist anymore… booo. Plus my name is my name I ain’t changing it lol” – Totally get this point!!

My favourite response was this…

“I think it shows your commitment to that person and a start of your family” 🥰

The responses were a mixed bag. Some for, some against, some wanting a compromise.

After being at a family wedding and feeling the love all around me, I had experienced something that was totally overwhelming. I never felt it before!

It was like a had an epiphany and I knew in that moment I wanted to take his surname!

Fast forward a few months and I’m back to wanting to keep my surname 🤣

I’ll keep you up to date with my name sitch 🥰

Peace

Xoxo

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22.11.21 – My Instagram freebie!

Dear diary,

This is just a quick one to let you guys know I have a FREE ebook dedicated to supporting anyone who is/has gone through baby loss.

I created the ebook in time for baby loss awareness week, which takes place annually on 9th-15th October.

If you head on over to my Instagram profile – my handle is @ empress_sah …whilst you’re there you might as well give me a follow 😜 – click on my bio, click on my instabio link and you’ll find it there.

You don’t need to pay anything!

Please use the information to help you in your journey.

We all deal with things differently and you may find some techniques or ideas helpful to your grieving process 🙂❤️

It may not even be you who needs it! You might know someone else who has/is going through baby loss. Just point whoever needs it in the right direction 😘

If I can help only one person, it’ll mean the world!

Peace ✌🏾

Xoxo

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26.10.21 – The National Snow Show with Urban Shredderz

Dear diary,

This weekend I had the pleasure of supporting snow sports brand Urban Shredderz at The National Snow Show in Birmingham.

Side note – I write blogs for this brand part time ❤️

Urban Shredderz is a brand dedicated to encourage people from diverse backgrounds to try snow sports and to challenge cultural taboos when it comes to the sport.

I’m a big fan of their motto – Be defiant! Become the norm! As someone who is naturally defiant, this slogan is definitely something I relate to! 😂

Be defiant! Become the norm!

Whilst there, Urban Shredderz and I, were able to meet people from some amazing snow sports brands and Urban Shredderz founder Dazzle got to talk on stage and in front of the camera about all things brand related .

It was an amazing experience and I was honoured to be there with a brand who is striving for change in our community!

If you haven’t heard of the brand before, definitely check them out! They host events called “The Link Up” where like minded people go indoor snowboarding and catch a vibe! Sounds like my kind of thing!

The Link Up

Once you feel confident on the slopes after a few “Link Ups” you can join the group on a snow sports holiday abroad in the mountains!

A holiday full of fun, good vibes and good people? Mi deyah!!!

I’m yet to try snow sports but keep an eye out for that experience! It’s coming soon 🙌🏾

You can find Urban Shredderz at http://www.urbanshredderz.co or @urbanshredderz on Instagram

Peace ✌🏾 xoxo

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9.10.21 – Baby loss awareness week ❤️

Dear diary,

Some of you may or may not know that a few years ago, I unfortunately suffered 3 consecutive miscarriages.

It was by far the hardest time of my life.

For years, I had suffered in silence. Only talking to a small few about things, not everything, but certain things.

Every year, on the 9th – 15th October, it is baby loss awareness week.

This week has always had negative connotations for me. I always link it to sad, deep emotions and traumatising flashbacks but this year, I feel a sense of community and strength now that I am being more open about my experiences.

I want to continue reaching out to others who have suffered a baby loss and connect.

Let’s keep reminding them that they aren’t alone.

What happened to us, wasn’t our fault.

We shouldn’t be embarrassed or ashamed.

We are still strong women! Men, so are you! You suffer too!

So to anyone who has been affected by baby loss, please feel free to reach out for a chat ❤️

I’d love to hear from you

xoxo

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19.9.21 – Come dine with me…

Dear diary,

If you don’t already know, I love me some food!

Programmes like Master Chef, Dinner Date and Great British Bake Off are some of my faves!

As I’ve been knee deep in Celeb Master Chef for the last couple of months, it got me thinking…

“If I had a dinner party, who would I invite?”

Now, obvs, I would invite all of my co-d’s and my family but if I had 6 golden tickets to invite anyone I wanted – dead or alive – who would it be?

I didn’t have to think too hard to be honest.

Here’s who I would choose –

Nipsey Hussle – Nip was such an insightful guy. He often spoke about contributing to his community, which I found inspiring. When he passed, I was honestly devastated. I would love to ask him about his upbringing and what inspired him to take the route he chose in life.

Chadwick Boseman – Another soul gone too soon. Chadwick was Marvel’s superhero – Black Panther, King T’Challa. Chadwick did this and more roles whilst fighting cancer. I would love to talk to him about the roles he played and how he pushed through the physical pain of his illness to play his characters with such conviction.

Aaliyah – Beautiful Aaliyah. One of my favourite singers! Her music is timeless, unique and linked to so many of my childhood memories. I’d love to talk to her about the height of her career and what her biggest achievement was before she left us.

Mo the comedian – I’ve followed Mo since he started his sketches on social media. His laugh makes me laugh before I’ve even heard the joke! He’s soaring in his career at the moment and I would love to talk to him about breaking down barriers as a black man from London who is now on prime time TV.

Mary J. Blige – Another one of my fav singers. She has produced album after album of pure greatness. It’s no secret that Mary’s early life was hard, to say the least. I would love to talk to her about overcoming certain life issues and how it feels to be the Queen of Hip Hop and RnB.

And last, but by no means least….Rihanna! – My birthday twin. My Pisces hottie! Rihanna has built herself a billion dollar empire and continues to push boundaries and the goal posts. Just when you think Rihanna couldn’t do anymore, she shows us there’s no limit to her creativity or ability. I’d want her there for pure vibes and to talk about how she continues to create greatness.

Who would you invite to your dinner party?

Let me know

xoxo